Ok, so now what was this all about?
Question: Was this about the liquid plutonium that was to be sold to Russian mafia for creating 'qahar' all over?
Answer: If so, then well the film should have been set up in MR. INDIA genre since the entire execution of the episode has been done while targeting the mind of 6 year old?
Question: Was this about the turbulence between Afghanistanis and Taliban?
Answer: If so, then the film could have referred to the kind of research done for KABUL EXPRESS. The results were far more convincing there.
Question: Was this about a 4 days/5 nights 'videsh darshan' with as many as 5 countries thrown in for bargain?
Answer: If so, then the film could well have taken an overseas tour agency as creative consultants. They would have done a far better job than the agent Rashid who himself never knows where he is trekking.
Question: Was this about the love story between an ex-cop (now a loser) and a girl who chooses a 70s style 'gaddaar' scientist for a hubby?
Answer: If so, then the film could well have stuck to just being an out and out action film. It is relatively easier to tolerate Rashid mian than this babe who hangs out in pubs and beaches at an alarming pace.
Question: Was this about the escape of 10-12 (or were they 11?) illegal migrants who keep getting reduced by one every reel?
Answer: If so, then the film could well have referred to a slasher flick. At least there is some amount of unpredictability about who-is-gonna-bump-of-next!
Question: Was this about the group of buffoons in the name of illegal migrants who make the kind of faces that even Jaspal Bhatt would have rejected 20 years back for his 'Flop Show'?
Answer: If so, then no wonder they were jobless. Except for being eliminated in the first round of 'Great Indian Laughter Challenge', they hardly any other job option.
Question: Was this about this 'Great Pakistani Military Officer' who is on a road to redemption and takes 'vibhinn-vibhinn-prakaar-ke-roop' before he kind heartedly rescues a bunch of Indians?
Answer: If so, then probably he is the most patriotic Pakistani ever born. He was just making sure that the bunch of buffoons do not stay within the borders of his own country.
Question: What was this all about?
Answer: Well, go and figure it out for yourself. 'Kaafila' is perhaps one of the most unintentionally funny films after 'Jaani Dushman' which again starred Sunny Deol.